Our Hearts are Sick when they are burdened with Stress
Nothing rings truer to me right now than this quote.
In the last 14 days I have traveled from Austin to DFW. I have spent more than 8 nights away from home. What did I do in that? I trained over 120 agents on Medicare 101, our call center opportunity, and our clinic initiative. I have attended 2016 Product Rollout Meetings for the multiple carriers we represent. I have held the hands of about 50 new and existing agents to help them grow their insurance portfolio and their business. I have done over 20 personal business and strategy meetings with agents one-on-one. I also have to deal with the political warfare that happens in any corporation. When you start rising to the top, people try to keep you down. So I’m constantly trying to overcome the things that are being said and I work three times as hard.
I have also broken bread multiple times with the Executives from these carriers and our offices as well as entertained agent managers for each of these carriers. When did I sleep? How many nights was I home? I counted. In 14 days, I was home 6 days. However, even when I was home, I was still plugged in. I was answering phone calls, text messages and emails. So in reality I have been gone from my family for 14 days.
Has it caused strained on a new marriage? HECK YES!
Are my children feeling abandoned? HECK YES!
I have reached a point in my career that most can only dream of. I have everything I want professionally. But personally, I haven’t been able to attend church or our COM group in 14 days. I am exhausted. I am tired. I am weak. I can hear my body screaming “STOP” My skin is dry, my hair is falling out and my husband and children are miserable! When I am home and finally have a moment to myself, I want it ALL to myself.
I have become everything I want to be professionally but not who I am personally. Maintaining the professional life has caused so much stress with travel, a constantly ringing phone and last minute office trips that my heart is sick. I am sick with stress. It has taken over my life and it is spilling over into my personal life affecting those I love. I sleep on the couch away from my husband, my son can’t talk to me because I just want to be left alone and my daughter just stays away from me because well in her words “you’re grouchy” And everything they do, annoys me (some of it warranted but most not).
Then one day, I “let it go and let God”.
And Jesus is the eternal healer of hearts
As hard as I work, I do enjoy my job. I am blessed to lead a small group of women in our Women’s Leadership program. All 4 women are strong Christian Women of God. I could not get through my week without these 4 fabulous ladies. They keep me grounded-in faith, in my work life balance, and in everything I do. Last week we had a very brief meeting after one of our trainings. We were chit chatting when one of my agents blew me away.
She said, “Can I pray for you?”
I’m sure I had a shocked look on my face. And she said again “Myra, honey, you are a newlywed and you look like death warmed over. You should be on top of the world right now, but you look like the Walking Dead”.
I chuckled. Then she asked the tough questions “How’s your marriage? How are the kids? When was the last time you ate at home?” Because of the close relationship I have with these women I began tearing up. Then she started quoting me on some things I have preached to them. “You must take care of you or you are no good to anyone else-your spouse, your children, or anyone. You aren’t doing that are you?”
I tried to be strong but I could feel God with his hand on me telling me to let it go. As much as I wanted to be their leader, I felt God’s hand guiding and I heard this voice saying “open up”. I broke down for the first time in 14 days. I let all my worries, all my stress out and laid it all out to this small group of women I lead; this group I trust. This group of women I’m suppose to be strong for. These women I am suppose to lead saw me vulnerable for the first time ever. But then something amazing happened. As I began talking about my worries, my life stressors something came over everyone and each one of these fabulous women opened up. None of us had any idea we were each dealing with “things”; with stressors in our lives. I think we get so stuck in our own world we forget that others deal with stress too. In this small conference room, 5 women laughed, cried, “let it go” and then closed in prayer. The stress immediately lifted.
JESUS IS MY HEALER!
I am blessed that God has placed some fabulous Christian brothers and sisters in my work environment. I am blessed to have children and a husband who love me unconditionally. But most of all, I am blessed that Jesus is my healer!
A Blessed Woman in TX